What is love?
In Ancient Greece, love was a concept pondered by some of history's most famous philosophers, including Plato and Aristotle. Greek philosophers attempted to explain love rationally and often categorized the different kinds of love people could feel—the different types of love you might find out there.
eros
Original Greek: ἔρως (érōs)
Eros is physical love or sexual desire. Eros is love that involves passion, lust, or romance.
Examples of eros would be the love felt between, well, lovers. Eros is the sensual love between people who are sexually attracted to each other. In the Bible, eros was synonymous with "marital love" because husbands and wives were supposed to be the only people having sex. Eros was also the name of a loving god in Greek mythology—better known by his Roman name, Cupid—and was responsible for shooting magic arrows at people to make them fall in love.
The word eros is still used in psychology today to refer to sexual desire or libido. The words erotic and erogenous, which both have to do with sexual desire or arousal, are derived from eros.
philia
Original Greek: ϕιλία (philía)
Philia is affectionate love. Philia is the type of love that involves friendship.
Philia is the kind of love that firm friends feel toward each other. However, it doesn't stop there. The Greek philosopher Plato thought that philia was an even greater love than eros and that the most vital loving relationships were ones wherephilia led to eros: a "friends become lovers" situation. Our concept of platonic love—love that isn't based on physical attraction—comes from this Platonic philosophy.
The word philia is related to philosophy through the combining form philo-. Philia is the source of the combining forms -philia, -phile, and -phily, all three of which indicate a figurative love or affinity for something.
agape
Original Greek: ἀγάπη (agápē)
Agape often defines as unconditional, sacrificial love. Agape is the kind of love felt by a person willing to do anything for another, including sacrificing themselves, without expecting anything in return. Philosophically, agape is defined as the selfless love that a person feels for strangers and humanity. Agape is the love that allows heroic people to sacrifice themselves to save strangers they have never met.
Agape is an important term in the Christian Bible, which is why it defines as "Christian love." In the New Testament, agape is the word used to describe God's love for humanity and the love humanity has for God. Agape was also the love that Jesus Christ felt for humanity, which explains why he was willing to sacrifice himself.
storge
Original Greek: στοργή (storgé)
Storge is familial love. Storge is the natural love that family members have for one another.
Of all types of love, storge might be the easiest to understand. It is the type of love that parents feel toward their children and vice versa. Storge also describes the love that siblings feel towards each other and the love felt by even more distant kin relationships, such as a grandparent for a grandchild or an uncle toward a niece.
mania
Original Greek: μανία (manía)
Mania is obsessive love. Mania is the kind of "love" a stalker feels toward their victim.
As a type of love, mania is not good, and the Greeks knew this as well as we do. Mania is excessive love that reaches the point of obsession or madness. Mania describes what a jilted lover feels when they are incredibly jealous of a rival or the unhealthy habit that can result from mental illness.
The Greek mania is the source of the English word mania and similar words like maniac and manic. It is also the source of the combining form -mania, often used in terms that refer to obsessive behavior, such as pyromania and egomania.
Ludus
Original Latin: The word ludus comes from Latin rather than Greek. In Latin, lūdus means "game" or "play," which fits with the type of love it refers to. One possible Greek equivalent is the word ερωτοτροπία, meaning "courtship."
Ludus is playful, noncommittal love. Ludus covers things like flirting, seduction, and casual sex.
Ludus means "play" or "game" in Latin, which explains ludus: love as a game. When it comes to ludus, a person is not looking for a committed relationship. People after ludus are looking to have fun or view sex as a prize. A "friends with benefits" situation would be an example of a relationship built on ludus: neither partner is interested in commitment. Of course, ludus may eventually result in eros—and hopefully not mania—if feelings of passion or romance emerge during the relationship.
The Latin lūdus is related to the playful words ludic and ludicrous.
pragma
Original Greek: πράγμα (prágma)
Pragma is practical love. Pragma is love based on duty, obligation, or logic.
Pragma is the unsexy love you might find in political, arranged marriages throughout history. This businesslike love is seen in relationships where practicality takes precedence over sex and romance. For example, two people may be in a relationship because of financial reasons or because they have more to lose by breaking up than staying together.
Pragma may even involve a person tolerating or ignoring their partner's infidelity, as was common in politically motivated royal marriages in much of world history. Pragma may not sound all that great to many, but pragma can coexist alongside other types of love, such as ludus or eros.
As you might have guessed, pragma is related to pragmatics, a word about practicality.
philautia
Original Greek: ϕιλαυτία (philautía)
Philautia is self-love. No, not that kind. Philautia refers to how people view themselves and feel about their bodies and mind.
The modern equivalent of philautia would be self-esteem (good) or hubris (destructive). People with high self-esteem, pride in themselves, or a positive body image practice a healthy version of philautia. Of course, philautia has a dark side, too. Egomaniacal narcissists who think they are better than everybody else are also an example of philautia, but not in a healthy way. The duality of philautia shows that love, even self-love, can often get pretty complicated.
