Navigating Emotional Release

19 Jun

I've observed myself going into catharsis, an extreme release of emotions, during release exercises or bodywork. While catharsis can be powerful, it often leads to overwhelm or withdrawal. another way is to stay calm while releasing, a space usually called the "Window of Tolerance."

Window of Tolerance

The "Window of Tolerance" is our emotional sweet spot. It's where we're alert yet calm, able to process experiences without becoming overwhelmed. Outside this window lie two states:

1. Hypo Arousal (Shutdown): Feeling numb, disconnected, or frozen.

2. Hyper Arousal (Fight/Flight): Feeling anxious, panicky, or angry.

The Power of Tracking

'Tracking' is a powerful tool for staying within your Window of Tolerance. It involves tuning into your body's subtle (and not-so-subtle) cues to gain insights into your emotional state.

I've found tracking particularly useful in my romantic relationship. Articulating what I'm feeling, especially when conflict is building can help me to stay centered and also soften the emotional field.

How to Practice Tracking

1. Focus on your breath, noticing its rhythm and depth.

2. Scan your body from head to toe, noting any sensations.

3. Pay attention to your heart rate, stomach feelings, and posture.

4. Notice any impulses or urges you're experiencing.

Common Physical Cues

Anxiety - Rapid heartbeat, shallow breathing, sweating, trembling or shaking, tension in shoulders and neck
Anger - clenched jaw or fists, flushed face, increased body temperature, tightness in the chest, rapid breathing
Sadness - heaviness in the chest or heart area, lump in the throat, drooping shoulders, fatigue or lack of energy, aches in the body
Fear - goosebumps, cold sweats, tightness in the stomach, dry mouth, dilated pupils
Shame - hunched posture, desire to physically shrink or hide, flushed face and neck, averted gaze, tension in the gut

Recognising Hypo and Hyper Arousal

As you practice tracking, you'll become more adept at recognizing when you're leaving your Window of Tolerance.

Techniques for Returning to the Window of Tolerance

For Hypo Arousal (Shutdown):

- Move your body: Jump, shake, dance, or stretch

- Make sounds

- Speed up and deepen your breath

For Hyper Arousal (Fight/Flight):

- Take slow, deep breaths

- Slow down your movements

- Brush your hands down your arms, repeating "safe, peace, hope, calm"

- Meditate

- Stroke your throat gently while humming

Remember, the goal isn't to avoid Hypo or Hyper Arousal states entirely - they're natural responses. Instead, aim to recognize when you're leaving your Window of Tolerance and use these tools to guide yourself back. With practice, this approach allows for deeper, more sustainable emotional release and personal growth.

Idea: Try practicing the body scan exercise daily. Notice how your awareness of your emotional state improves over time.